Home
About Kate
Costs
Contact Me
Feedback
Google Maps
Services
Resources
FAQs
Confidentiality
Professional Conduct

 

 

 

 

 

 

"I don't deserve to have this time devoted to me. The therapist should be helping someone who really needs it"
The fact that you are enquiring into counselling and psychotherapy indicates that a part of you really does want help but you are not feeling good enough about yourself to feel okay with receiving comfort and professional help. You may have learned from your family that “you should not be selfish” or that you “don’t deserve anything good”. Remember that you do deserve it.

"I feel weak if I ask for help. I should be self-sufficient and able to work things out for myself"
If something goes wrong with your television, do you feel that you have to fix it yourself? Once you’ve checked the plug and maybe hit the side and the telly doesn’t get better after several days, you probably will want to call a specialist – a technician who spends his days fixing televisions. People and emotions are much more complicated than your television set. Learning how to solve emotional problems isn’t part of what we are taught at school. Fortunately, there are people (therapists) who specialise in deciphering emotional problems in order to help people recover from emotional difficulties and traumas (Unlike the television technician though, the therapist can only facilitate you to heal yourself, they can't do your healing for you).

I know that it can be hard to ask for help, but it takes a strong willed person to put aside all of the issues raised in these notes, and set aside all of the thoughts about what other people will think, and take that scary step that leads to growth and self-understanding. It takes courage for people to turn to the experts to help tackle a problem. It's okay to ask for help.

"The therapist will see things in me that other people can't see and will pass judgement on me"
Therapists are not mind readers. They are good at noticing body cues and facial expressions, but they do not know what is going on in your mind until you tell them. Good therapists, will not blame, ridicule, or pass judgment on you. If they do, then they are not doing their job properly. If you feel that I am being judgmental then discuss this with me and if you are not satisfied with the outcome, then you can find another therapist.

"My problems are not my fault. I'm not the one that needs to change"
Whenever you are in a situation with more than one person, every encounter will always have actions and reactions. If things are not going well with parents, spouse, or friends, and it is all "their fault," then consider that you may be able to learn more effective ways of dealing with their reactions.